All Out For The LORD, But Way Off

Sunday, April 03, 2005


Dear fellow human, have u ever wonder what life is about? Is it usually about selfish thinking? Is it usually about "MYSELF" n those related to "ME" only? Or is there more to it than that? MONEY = LIFE? For this entry, i'll write bout e sermon taught today, n my view on some personal thoughts.

For Christian:
Sermon is about the lessons learnt from Jehu's relationship with God. (2 Kings 10)
Jehu, who was anointed to be king of Israel at his time, listened to God's word, but he did many things which are more ruthless to the instructions given. God told him to get rid of Ahab's family, due to countless sins done over e yrs, he asked the people frm the officials of Jezreel, who wanted to lean on him, to kill their masters, the 70 princes. He wanted the HEAD of all 70 PRINCES and he even placed them in 2 piles in a small field~! God did not ask for that. He even proclaimed it's God who wanted that.

His wrongs: Adopting uncivilised methods. Getting rid of distant families with no blood relationship. Using others for own advantage.

Jehu then proceeded on to kill the ministries of baal, a God which human created n worshipped. He tricked everyone to assemble at the Baal's temple, and killed them inside.

His wrongs: Deceiving to get rid of idolatry. Destroying one form with another unacceptable form.

Lesson learnt: We should not misuse God's intention to our own advantage. We should not always blame God for disasters, mishaps and bad events that happened in our life or in the today's world. We should not always have that mentality that, since God did not reply our prayers, we can FOLLOW OUR OWN HEARTS. At times, self reflect on yourself whether u did listen when he speaks to us.

My queries answered
Other than going church today, i chatted with Benedict, my church friend, about alot of stuff. After those chatting, and on my way back home via bus, i read a book i've bought 2 or 3 mths ago. It titled "Authentic Beauty". Of cos it's a christian book. The reason i bought that bk, is cos.. i felt lonely at times.. Walking in circles again and again without finding the exit. I found answers but questions appeared immediately after that. At times, i think of many things. Future... Friends... and guy...

Future: what do i really want to be? Somehow, i convinced myself unknowingly that, I wanted to be a engineer. I wanted to earn enough MONEY and to live a comfortable life with my parents. I don't want to be an average human being. I wanted to excel and at the same time, to love my job. Can i do that? I'm not sure.

Friends: I "bought" friends when i was in pri sch. I saved all my money just to treat friends so they would be close to me. In sec sch, true friends appeared. They're there for me to guide me. In JC, more friends appeared. Crappy and studious at e same time. Uni, more more friends appeared. Abit cold, but warmth at times. In uni, i did some wrong stuff, n somehow spoilt a bit of a friendship with a friend. I felt like a spy, an untrustworthy friend, n i'm ashamed of it. I tried to change, so i controlled what goes out of my mouth. But, i'm not sure whether it change anything.

Guys: In accordance to the book, MY TRUE PRINCE should be JESUS CHRIST. I am someone tt likes pple easily, reason being, maybe i have not know myself well enough. Or maybe i wanted to prove to myself .. something... As quoted from the book, We utter quick prayers here and there, and when we hear no reply from heaven, we assume it is up to us to figure out on our own. Then we end up making terrible mistakes and wondering where He was the whole time. I am like that, i guess.... wanting to make my own decision unknowingly... N thus, having to deal with some of the past bad experience. All i can do, is to treat it like a stepping stone. To learn and to grow from it.

Somehow, after church session today, i became rather emotional. I did alot of self reflection, and the first thing i did when i reached hm is switched on my lappie to write this. Sunday... reflection day... A day i have to change my wrong thinking, and be more like him, My TRUE prince.

A msg to Fanghui: I won't constantly ask u to come service anymore. Just come when u want to. I'll update the sermon every sunday for u. May God's word touched u!

4/03/2005 01:15:00 PM|