end of trial

Sunday, November 20, 2005


Shivered. Not sure y. Thought i'm ok. But i should be. So guess that's that. Finally. At last. No more trouble ever again!

26th October 2005. Started the trial. It's dunno 4th or 5th trial le. And once again, it don't work. It lasted for less than a month. I've tried, really..but i did not really put all my feelings in. Experience hurts and remains. It might stay there for as long as i live.

The first few days was ok only. I was not really into it.. but i play along. I was wondering what i should do. Break off fast when i first noticed that i don't feel anything, or jus continue with the trial knowing that it won't last long also. Continue was actually not really that right way, but it was still right in the end. By continuing, it meant a permanent full stop. Never starting the same trial again. But by continuing, some part of me need to readjust again. Damn. This trial should not even start. Sigh. I was scarred once again.

Glad enough, not much was taken away.. except for thinking of whether to sms anyway in the morning n night. Anyway.. no sweet sms was exchanged after a wk i think. No dear. No love. No muackx. No nothing. Just plain: "Good morning. I'm going for work." n "good night, i'm tired. Go slp first."

End of trial. Back to my own life. I'm not lonely, that's for sure. Most importantly, i got God, who is always there for me. Who always comfort me and talk to me. Who do not abandon me or lie to me. Who are caring in his way. Who guide me along as i walk this path called "LIFE". I also have friends who are fun loving to be with and makes me feel loved(in a not disgusting way)! Somehow, i laughed more when i'm with friends, than with him. I'm more like myself. Xia~!

Exams not over, so i'll continue to work hard. I'll kick anime and tv out of my life for a few more days. Got a hell lot of things to do after exam.

E trial: patching up with Louis once again. ended smoothly.ANd never would there be such trial with him again. I swear in God's my name~!!

11/20/2005 01:43:00 PM|