mum~~

Friday, March 19, 2004


Selfish is defined as "Concerned chiefly or only with oneself". Since young, i've been taught that parents are always right. There's always a reason for their actions. They're always right. Children should not disagree with what their parents think as parents lived longer than them, n they experience more things than children, n thus, they're MATURE~! BUt one thing for sure.. PARENTS ARE ALSO HUMAN. Parents don't experience the same things we experience as we, children of this generation, lived in a more developed country, n we experienced stuff that they might not experience before. What the hell am i talking about? I just have a damn same argument with mum. I hated her selfishness.

Mum always reasons with me.. but when i asked questions until a certain stage, mum would have nothing to say, n she'll call me to get out of her room. Damn her for that... I wished to portray mum as a wonderful mum who is ever caring to me.. but all i can picture of her now is .. SELFISHNESS. Mum always say that she's broke, n dad is not earning enough, n she cant get her pay.. n she cant possibly dig out money at all. Wow.. i believed her... n not long after she said how poor she is, she BOUGHT a new phone, n she got ANOTHER line which have free incoming call free. Imagine paying $50+ for 2 bills offering almost same sorta plan. Poor... hmm.. is that true? True enough, i used 2 line too.. but my 2 line plan costs are $15 & 10. After i total up my phone bill, it's not even e sum of one of my mum's line. Argh.

Poor.. but there's always money to go on HOLIDAY~! Holiday does not meant Malaysia, Singapore's neighbouring country. Holiday meant CHINA. It's not e first time she claimed she's poor yet she got money to go holiday. Last yr, she went China with dad as dad did not go overseas for a long long time. After 2- 3 weeks after being back from China, she left for JAPAN. Wow.. that's POOR. For e previous few arguments.. she claimed that she might die early, meaning, she wanted to go overseas when she got e chance to. Wow.. how great. Did e doc said she got any illness ?? Nah.. NV~! Argh..

Mum cared bout me.. BEFORE. I always believe what she said.. but lately.. her reasons are becoming LAMER or a better word, RUBBISH. Y did she go holiday this time? Because she wanted to force her boss to sack her. How cool.... SHe tried to quit previously, but her boss only agreed on a break for her, n she took that happily. She said she don't want her boss to find her, so she HAD TO go on a holiday. How TRUE~! I cant help doubting what my mum said. Y cant she think in my shoe? She's claiming one thing, n doing e other stuff. Argh. There's a possibilities that i'll not be able to go University. Y? Cause i don't think mum can dig out money for me ANYMORE~! She could only dig out money for her holiday.

I'm vexed. I'm angry. I'm mad. I cant stand mum anymore. I don't ever want to talk to her. She disappoints me time n time again with her lies. I don't even know whether i can trust her with anything. How i wish i was never born. I wish mum could overtalk me with her reasons.. but at a certain stage of e argument.. mum always have nothing to defend herself. Y? I don't know. I'm lost.. I don't know what to think. I'm disappointed. I'm crying.....

3/19/2004 06:07:00 PM|